THE KING OF ARUGULA (BOOK ONE: THE HOLE STORIES)

On the way home from my Uncle Sol's funeral I fell into a deep, dark hole. At the bottom of that hole I met a strange, smelly man named R.E. Flex. I asked him how he ended up in the hole...and so began the tale of Onus and Twig, two ten-year-old boys on a quest to find the one-eyed giant who sold Onus's mother the tomato that made Twig go blind. Along the way the boys cross a vicious hyper monkey, plagues of locusts, a museum of human legs and a man so villainous a simple description of the terrible things he does would give you nightmares for weeks.

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FOWL, SWINE AND THINGS THAT SEND SHIVERS DOWN YOUR SPINE (BOOK TWO: THE HOLE STORIES)

Onus and Twig just want to get home and go to bed after all that happened in Arugula. But a run in with a cat named Lemy sends them far off course... so far in fact, they end up in a strange town called Cygnus Monde, where the streets are overrun with hair-stealing swans and the residents are oddly fixated on one thing... a place called Tchaikovsky’s. When Twig catches a mean itch and refuses to move because of how uncomfortable his head is, Onus must leave his friend and find a cure. Along the way he finds a pigpen full of kids, a man dressed up like a pack of gum, a shop filled with animals that look like statues, worms the size of jet airplanes and a “next to impossible” truth that puts the “hole” situation in perspective... terrible itches and strange residents are the least of Cygnus Monde’s problems.

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THE HEALING SAND (BOOK THREE: THE HOLE STORIES)

Onus and Twig have inadvertently ruined another of William Ernest Fang's elaborate plans and are finally on their way home, thanks to a scent-tracking mox named Gromley. But a chance encounter with a very broken man leads the boys to a strange town that is hiding two big secrets: the town possesses a magical sand only spoken about in urban legends, and this sand, which is used for so much good, has a dark side to it that no one is willing to admit... a dark side that may keep Onus and Twig from ever getting home.

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CROW TOES QUARTERLY:
TALES FROM A PLAYFULLY DARK WORLD

In late 2006, a shadowy character appeared on the literary scene. He called himself the Narrator and his dream was to publish a playfully dark arts and literature magazine for children. He hired a staff villain, a lackey named Ogilvy and a reporter named Poinsettia Park, and soon after he released the very first issue of Crow Toes Quarterly. TALES FROM A PLAYFULLY DARK WORLD is a sometimes hilarious, often terrifying collection of experiences compiled by the Narrator during his four years publishing Crow Toes Quarterly. It is proof that running an arts and literature magazine for children can be downright dangerous at times.

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