ARGYLE BURNS (@SpookyShadowZoo)

Argyle Burns writes spine-tingling 140-character stories for children (and adults who refuse to grow up). Here are a few examples:

A pecan pie the size of a swimming pool wasn’t meant to be eaten. But he was going to do it. He attached his second stomach and dug in...

On the third swing the axe broke through the bark, revealing the trapped rainbow. It was still vibrant. The lumberjack would win this battle.

She looked at the red goo inside the vial and asked, What does it do? He said, It makes you a zombie for one minute. She gasped and drank it

The Sasquatch pressed a plaster cast of a big foot into the mud. His goal...propel the myth. If they knew he was a size 9 they’d stop caring

Read more of Argyle's stories on Twitter.